Hi blog friend, I need your help. I’m struggling with insomnia, and I want your advice on what to do about it. (I know, this isn’t about diet or vegetables, but let me tell you—getting enough sleep makes eating healthy about a hundred times easier.) I realized after reading Heather’s post on anxiety that I’m not the only one dealing with sleep issues—and that it’s better to reach out than pretend everything’s cool.
You see, I’ve got a new media project coming up (more on that soon) that I’m actually really excited about. However, I’m also dealing with general life anxiety—for whatever reason, it hit me a couple of weeks ago that I’m 35 and not exactly where I thought I’d be by now.
The result? Really lousy sleep.
Falling asleep takes awhile, but even worse is staying asleep—I just can’t seem to do it. Nearly every day I wake up between 3 – 4 am. I’m totally exhausted, but instead of rolling over and drifting back to la-la land, I start thinking about everything I have to do—all the loose ends still hanging out there—and suddenly I’m wide awake, adrenaline pumping.
The result, of course, is that when I need to get work done during the day, I’m wiped out! Which means I drink more coffee. Which means I don’t sleep as well. Which makes me even more wiped out.
Wash, rinse, repeat.
Of course, I’m not taking this lying down (I’m so punny!): I’m exercising more (doubled my walking to 4 miles a day) and trying not to eat late at night. That usually helps, but this time it doesn’t seem to be doing the trick.
Seeking your suggestions
In the midst of my despair, I had a comforting realization: I have you. My readers are a smart, accomplished group of women (and men) who have no doubt dealt with insomnia too. So I’m asking for any advice you can give:
- Do you get insomnia?
- What helps you fall asleep?
- What helps you stay asleep?
I’d love to learn habits that help you drift off, [plant-based] foods that makes you sleepy, or anything else that works for you. Hopefully your ideas will not only help me, but anyone else out there trying desperately to sleep.
Share your advice in the comments now—I’m really looking forward to reading it!
You might also like:
I'm Lee, an RD thriving on a healthy plant based diet.
Yoga/Meditation, Chamomile/Herbal Teas/Tisanes, Marley’s Mellow Mood Teas, Essential Oils, etc just a few ideas – I’m sure you have already tried some of them 🙂
Hi Jennifer, thanks for the suggestions! I actually just started meditating again–you’re not the only person to gently suggest that it’s time to get back to it… 🙂 I know the sleep benefits take awhile to kick in, though, so I’m trying to be patient. I actually haven’t tried any of your other advice; I’m breaking out the lavender oil tonight, though, and I’m looking forward to trying Marley’s Mellow Mood Teas. (The lite mango looks yummy, and caffeine free, too!) Thanks for sharing what helps you!
Hi, folks, Mom Crosby here. I have always had the same difficulties (genes, go figure!) So, for a long time now I have tried to reduce the caffeine and, believe it or not, taking a brief nap if I feel absolutely wiped. My other go to methods are reading only super light or very boring material and saying a prayer of thanks before I roll over into dream land. I have also been using herbal teas and honey. But, I am always looking for new ideas myself and am getting ready to try Lavender oil Marley’s. THANKS for the tip Jennifer.
Thanks Mom! Great point: I do need to remember my blessings–and find some more light/boring reading material. 😉 Ever since I slowed back on my Kindle book-buying habit in an attempt to be a responsible person on a budget, my insomnia has gotten worse. Coincidence? Hmm… Anyone know if it’s possible to check out library eBooks on a Kindle??
HI Lee–I agree with the other two comments in terms of helpful things. I would say stay away from the caffeine entirely if you can. Grains like millet and oats in the evening are also calming, as is oatstraw tea. Another very simple thing is this. As a personal born with mild cerebral palsy and mildly spastic muscles, getting to sleep and staying asleep are always works in progress for me. I used to tell me Mom when I was a little girl that I couldn’t sleep. She’d say “just stay horizontal.” I think she was right. It does help to be laying down, even if you’re not sleeping. And it doesn’t help at all to freak out that you’re not sleeping. Reciting a favorite prayer, chant, or listing the things you’re grateful for is good medicine. Or deliberately taking yourself to a relaxing memory or favorite safe place. If you know reiki points or other relaxation points to hold, that also can help. (And I hate to say this, but chocolate also keeps me awake. Hence all the carob powder in my recipes. 🙂 Hang in there–and at leat get horizontal, as the jazz musicians used to say.
And what’s this about not being where you think you should be at the ripe old age of 35? Come on, now, maybe it’s that grand plan that needs some revising. Life is now, each moment we live it. So another good thing is to return yourself to the moment. The moonlight through the window. The creaks of the house, the feel of the sheets on your skin, hubby next to you. Your breath, like a tide. The future is built of moments in the now. And in my book, you’re bright, beautiful, wise, creative and generous right here, right now. Rest on those laurels if you can. xoxo
Maria, you are truly the best. Can you move to Maryland so we can have a weekly [decaf] coffee date? It’s just a teeny, tiny little hop across the country… 😉
Like you, I’ve never been a great sleeper, although I haven’t had to contend with spastic muscles. How frustrating that must have been (and still be, no doubt)! I like the idea of staying horizontal, although I’ve found that if I get out of bed and lay down on the couch, I have a better chance of nodding off. (Maybe because I’m less likely to freak out about not sleeping in the living room, for whatever reason.) I also love the reminder to go to a pleasant place in my mind–I’m very creative with pondering future “disaster” scenarios, so why not use that power for good and imagine myself on a peaceful beach listening to the waves roll in? Or at the very least, look at the “awake” time as an opportunity to engage in the prayer and meditation you suggested (which I’m always telling myself I’ll do more of, and then don’t).
And thank you for the vote of confidence. Why is it so hard to stay in the present moment? Considering that’s the only moment any of us ever really has? I’ll be keeping your words in mind and working on it!
Chocolate gives me insomnia every time, unfortunately! It has both caffeine and theobromine which raise the heart rate. So my advice is to stay away (not easy, I know!)
Lemon balm, catnip and lavendar herbal teas help me. Lavander essential oil (a drop or two) on the pillow can help.
I’m in my late 40’s so peri-menopause often causes me insomnia, too. But chocolate, more than anything else, is my undoing (and it’s weird… I can feel it raising my heart rate around 5-6 hours after consuming it!) Also, avoid looking at a screen (TV, Kindle, computer) for at least an hour before bedtime.
Good luck!
Hi Teri, I think you’re on to something with chocolate! I eat it a lot at night, but I don’t think anything of it because it has so little caffeine. I didn’t realize, though, that theobromine raises heart rate too. Yikes! Thank you for the heads up!!
Also, a friend actually got me some lavender essential oil a few months ago, but I’d never gotten into the habit of using it. I wonder if smelling it when I wake up in the pre-dawn hours would help me get back to sleep? Thanks for your advice!
magnesium glycinate! It is amazing plus it’s magnesium which we need. Make sure you don’t use a different kind of magnesium because others will give you energy or diarrhea (citrate). Also, something I didn’t realize is.. I was drinking kombucha and couldn’t sleep and it has caffeine.
Hi Jen, I’ve never tried magnesium glycinate–I’ll have to look into it! Yeah, the last thing I need is more energy. (Or diarrhea, lol!) I’ll also steer clear of kombucha–I hear it has lots of health benefits, but no more caffeine for me. Thanks for sharing what works for you!
Working out in the AM for 1.5 hours and cutting caffeine by noon! THAT WORKS for me!
Hi GiGi, you’re inspiring me to step it up to 1.5 hours! 🙂 Cutting caffeine by noon’s going to be a beast, but I’m working on it. I’ll keep you updated on my progress; thanks for sharing what works for you!
Hi there. Not sure if youre still dealing w/ this. I have a couple tips- ive dealt w/ insomnia for years stemming from causes expected to be permanent. But it’s much improved in the last 3 years. Before you follow these, i’d recommend drs care, following their recommendations as to TEMPORARY medictions and/or sleep study to see if theres some easy answer. (I have chronic pain and nerve problems, so 5 sleep meds failed and i refused to try any more; sleep study gave me a clear bill, so it’s just the pain waking me up repeatedly.) My strategies are for managing longterm insomnia, of a type where you are awake greater than 45 minutes if you chose not to get out of bed– if these dont fit you, you might be better with shorter term approaches (like meds) or staying in bed combined with the longer term approaches.
I combine 2 approaches- acute management and lifestyle shift. Acute management includes strategies which make the insomnia events less upsetting for me personally, while lifestyle shifts include proper nutritional support, circadian rhythm regulation + nature exposure, spirituality practice, and light to moderate exercise.
First, acute management. How you field this categoryis somewhat personal, and will shift in time. My anxieties are soothed by having a plan/routine. So, when i wake up, i established a pattern. I began to accept the waking up as part of my expected sleeping pattern, and allowed myself to get up. I came up with a few very low-key activities to do when i woke up- burning a scented candle at the dining table was a favorite. I used to do scented baths, but i later stopped this because it’s a longer activity and i became able to get back to sleep more quickly. Making a cup of tea and a snack is a current fave– snacking isnt recommended but im underweight and need calories. Ive done stretching in the past as well. Nothing with TV or internet- music is ok though. By making the insomnia event less unexpected/dreadful/unpleasant, i felt i had some control over it again. Though i couldnt control waking, i could– over time — temper my response and attitude to it. This lessened the ‘anxiety-cycle’ that reinforces insomnia, by causing me to worry about it less as i came to acceot it.
The lifestyle factors are close to self-explanatory…. Proper nutritional support- your diet seems great w/ 2lb veg most days. I assume you take b12 if youre vegan, but im not vegan so im sure youre on top of it. Circadian rhythm regulation + nature exposure (meaning a walk or sit outside, 15-20 minutes), spirituality practice (as simple as 3 minutes reading an affirmation and some minutes of quiet reflection afterwards), and light to moderate exercise (20-30 minutes is enough for me, but before i was injured i preferred more)– these can all be done just 2 a 3x a week each, doesnt ALL need to be daily… get some colored stickers for a wall calendar to record after doing them, or plan it into a daily planner beforehand if youre proactive to make sure you hit it, though.
Hi Stephanie, WOW! Thank you for the great tips! I still have occasional struggles with insomnia, so I’ll be implementing some of these for sure. And I know other readers have issues with insomnia too, so I can only guess that you’ve helped other people with this info, too. Hope you’re still sleeping well and that your other conditions are under control. Also, would you mind if I share these tips in a future post on sleep? I’m happy to give you credit however you’d like (first name, both names, anonymous). Thanks again!
I take a tablespoon of raw local honey before bed, makes me sleep like a baby! 😴